Stars: Dee Wallace-Stone, Scott Grimes, M. Emmet Walsh 

Director: Stephen Herek

What if there were no fluffy mogwai Gizmo, just the mean Gremlins… 

Brief synopsis:

A group of prisoner space creatures, called Krites, break out of their ship and head to Earth, projected to land on a farm in Kansas. A couple of faceless bounty hunters as sent to capture them while the family goes about their day, unaware of the danger that is coming their way… 

Spoilers below (you have been warned):

Teenage brother and sister Brad and April get into petty squabbles while their mom, Helen, and dad, Jay, keep the peace. Brad is a bit of a troublemaker who makes homemade fireworks and hangs out with the farm handyman, Charlie. Charlie is a former baseball prospect who lost his mind when he started hearing voices in his head. Attempting to drown out these voices, Charlie turned to alcohol and blew his chances at a major league career. He now works odd jobs to make ends meet and usually sleeps in the police station after a night at the bar. 

April brings home her new boyfriend, Steve (a pre-Titanic Billy Zane) to meet her parents. Brad and Charlie are playing around with Brad’s slingshot when Charlie accidentally shots April in the ass. Covering for the farmhand, Brad takes the blame and gets sent to bed without supper. After supper, April takes Steve to the barn to make out while Jay tries gets ready for his bowling tournament after taking Brad a plate of food in his room. Brad hangs out with his cat, Chewie, and sees April head to the barn with Steve. Suddenly, he sees what he thinks is a meteor land in their fields. He climbs out of the bedroom window to check it out and runs into his dad who is doing the same thing. They go together to the field and find a spaceship. 

Meanwhile, the bounty hunters are on the ship trying to learn about Earth and find disguises for when they land. Bounty hunter Ug ends up taking on the face of rock star Johnny Steele while the other bounty hunter, Lee, cannot find one that likes him. The Krites go on the attack. They kill Steve and a local sheriff’s deputy. They then stalk the family as they huddle in their home. Dad gets shot with a spike that contains a neurotoxin. They remove the spike in time to stop any permanent damage. Lee and Ug come across the dead deputy and Lee’s takes his face, wounds and all. They go to a church looking for the Krites and Lee’s face changes to the reverend’s face. Next, they hit the local bar and run into Charlie. After shooting up the place, Lee’s face changes one more time to Charlie’s. Charlie follows the men out of the bar. Brad escapes the house and runs into the bounty hunters and they all head to his house.

The Sherriff, following up on a complaint of Charlie shooting up the bar, heads out to the farm. After a battle in the house, the Krites that have survived combine into a giant Krite and escape with April to their spaceship. They plan on using her for food as they head to the next planet. Brad drops on of his fireworks into the ship as he and Charlie rescue April. Charlie uses the alcohol he carries with him to create a Molotov Cocktail and throws it into the ship. The fire work goes off and destroys the ship but not before the Krites destroy the family’s house. Charlie flies off with the bounty hunters to start a new life with them and Ug leaves Brad a device to contact them in case the Krites return. As a final thank you to the family, they rebuild the house. Unfortunately, the family does not know that there is a nest of Krite eggs hiding in their chicken coop.   

My thoughts (with spoilers):

It is weird how things work out in the film world. Given the success of Gremlins, you would think that Critters is a cheap knock-off but you would be wrong. Critters was actually already written before Gremlins was released and just need fine-tuning before it went into production in 1985. Given that information, you would expect the producers to try and soften the tone, maybe create a monster character for the audience to relate to. Nope, they chose to go full chaos and thank goodness they did. This may not be a great film, but it is a hell of a lot of fun. 

The reason for this is the Krites themselves. Demonic hedgehogs, they are almost cute but not quite. They are mischievous and we even get subtitles to see what they are saying to each other in their alien language. They curse and are basic smart asses who we are happy to see get their comeuppance at the end of the film. They have no conscience and do not care about anything but themselves. They are ego run amok. Their only concern when they see a fellow Krite shot or blown up is self-preservation. The creature design by The Chiodo Brothers is perfect and we will be talking about them in a future post when we discuss their feature film debut. 

The acting is decent all around. Dee Wallace-Stone is an 80’s icon and she does her best with the basic mom role she is given here. Don Opper is really only known for the Critters franchise and his Charlie is empathetic. M. Emmet Walsh is fun as the put-upon Sherriff who is trying to understand what is happening to his little town. Scott Grimes is still acting today in major roles, most recently as the dad in the TV show Ted. His Brad is a basically good kid who gets into trouble for stupid stuff. He has a good heart, as evidenced by his covering for Charlie, but he still has no problem creating fire crackers and fire works for minor destruction. Terrance Mann is better known for his theater work but does a good job as Ug/Johnny Steele. He even gets to show off his vocal talents with the song “Power of the Night” a straight-up 80’s rock song. 

Critters was followed by multiple sequels, one even has the feature film debut of Leonardo DiCaprio, and a short-lived TV series. None of them were as good as the original, although Critters 2 does come close. This could be a fun double-feature with the original Gremlins or simply a stand-alone lazy Sunday afternoon watch.   

More films from 1986 to check out: 

Crocodile Dundee – Paul Hogan is a fish out of water as an Australian crocodile hunter who follows a reporter to New York City. Probably best known for the “This is a knife” line. 

Karate Kid II – Daniel and Mr. Miyagi head to Japan to see Mr. Miyagi’s dying father. Nice addition to the series and has a great Peter Cetera love song. 

Labyrinth – I tried to figure out a way to include this film in this blog but it just does not meet the criteria. David Bowie and Jennifer Connolly star in this fantasy film as a young teenage drama queen who has to rescue her baby brother from the Goblin King. Bowie gives his all to the role of the King and the music is amazing with several songs being on my favorites playlist. It is also the last film Jim Henson directed. Misunderstood in its day, this has become a cult classic and one that my kids and grandkids all enjoy.

Stars: Amy Steele, Deborah Foreman, Ken Olandt

Director: Fred Walton 

It’s time for a little getaway on a remote island with a few of your friends. Too bad a killer is joining your group. 

Brief synopsis: 

Muffy St. John has invited a small group of her classmates and friends to her island lake house for April Fool’s Day weekend. While Muffy sets up the house for her guests, her friends take the ferry over. They include horny couple Nikki and Chaz, steady couple Kit and Rob, class clown Arch, business minded Hal, Muffy’s cousin Skip, and bookish Nan. It is all fun and games until a prank by Arch and Skip ends up accidentally injuring one of the crew on the ferry.   

Spoilers below (you have been warned): 

Skip, upset that someone was injured because of him, drinks and hides away from the group. Everyone else sets up house and begins their weekend. The pranks start early and some are quite mean, including allusions to abortion, deadly car accidents, and drug addiction. Still the group enjoys their meal of champagne and hot dogs before retiring for the night. Skip ends up drunk in the boathouse and is confronted by someone there. 

The next day, everyone gets up to enjoy their lakeside setting. Everyone but Muffy, who seems disoriented and a mess. A small group of them play soccer while Kit and Rob enjoy the boat house for some sexy times. As Kit lays on the boathouse floor, she sees a dead Skip float on a boat underneath her. The couple quickly jumps up to tell the others what they saw. The boys, minus Hal, go in separate directions to try and find him. Nan confronts Muffy over the nasty baby crying recording in her room and then goes to cry. Arch ends up in a snare trap and is then attacked by someone. The water goes out at the house so Nikki and Hal go to the well to get water but the rope on the bucket breaks. Nikki outmans Hal and climbs down the rungs on the side of the well to retrieve the bucket and some water. The rungs fall out of the old well and she ends up in the bottom. As she flails around in the water, the bodies of Skip, Arch, and Nan float up. 

She makes it back to the house and they tell everyone what they have found. Rob talks to the constable for the area who informs him that the ferry captain and his mate are still at the hospital and to beware of Muffy. The group decides to secure the house and waits for help to arrive. Slowly, everyone but Rob, Kit, and Muffy are killed. Kit and Rob see a flare from the constable and head out to his boat to try and get away. There, they find a note that states that Ms. St. John has been in a mental hospital for the last few years. Kit says it can’t be Muffy since she has been at school with them. 

They climb into the basement and find a growth chart with the names Muffy and Buffy. Kit realizes that Buffy is doing everything. They see a pair of eyes behind a painting and Muffy’s head is behind it. Buffy begins nailing the windows shut so the couple flees upstairs to try and escape. Rob gets stuck in a closet while Buffy confronts Kit. Kit tries to reason with Buffy to no avail. She runs into the living room only to find… 

Again folks, major spoilers ahead – do not blame me if you read any further without seeing the film: 

Everyone is sitting in there, alive and well. They shout April Fool’s to Kit. The man injured on the ferry, Buck, surprises Rob in the closet and removes his latex mask before releasing him to see his friends alive. Muffy reveals that she will inherit the house and this was a dry run for a murder mystery weekend to pay for the expenses. Skip is not Muffy’s cousin, he is her twin brother. The constable is Muffy’s uncle and Buck was a make up man. The group parties to celebrate the success of the whole ruse. Later on, a drunk Muffy goes to her room to find a jack-in-the-box toy. She turns the crank but is shocked when, after it opens, she is grabbed from behind and her neck is sliced. This turns out to be the final prank from Nan, who seems satisfied to get the last April Fool’s of the weekend. 

My thoughts (with spoilers): 

Ok, this is a divisive film in the horror community but I don’t know why because they tell you up front that the entire film is a joke. The first time I watched the film, I clocked early on that we never see the murders on screen. At this point in the film, seeing the murders on screen was kind of a big deal for horror films. With no onscreen murders and the title, it was a no brainer to me that this was a big prank on the audience. It doesn’t make it any less fun of a ride. 

The chemistry between the actors is the biggest plus of the film. The actors hung out together before shooting started and the director even had the girls improvise the scene of them cooking in the kitchen. Amy Steel (Kit), Deborah Foreman (Muffy), and Deborah Goodrich (Nikki) are obviously having a lot of fun and that camaraderie shines through the entire scene. It also helps highlight the distance we get from “Buffy” once the switch comes the next day. “Buffy” is an obvious outcast, trying to fit it and failing miserably. Thom Wilson, Biff from Back to the Future, is great as the buffoon Arch. Clayton Rohner, star of ‘Just One of The Guys’, is perfect as the sex-crazed Chaz. The three other characters are not as memorable but capable in their roles. 

The direction is surprisingly good. The director of this film, Fred Walton, had previously directed ‘When A Stranger Calls’, which has an amazing opening 20 minutes but the rest of the film is just blah. Here, he manages to maintain the suspense and includes enough misdirects in the story beats to allow people to possibly question what is real and what isn’t. It is very well-paced and the performances he gets work for the material. The script isn’t groundbreaking but has enough originality and nods to classic murder mystery themes to really hook the audience. 

A fun little film that could be an introduction to horror for early teens, April Fool’s Day really was a breath of fresh air in the slasher genre and one I have fun revisiting every few years. 

More films from 1986 to check out: 

Ruthless People – Forgotten comedy starring Danny DeVito as a businessman who wants to get rid of his wife, Bette Midler. When she is kidnapped, he refuses to pay the ransom. Meanwhile, she bonds with her kidnappers and they plot to get back at him together. Definitely worth tracking down. 

Wildcats – Another forgotten comedy, this one with Goldie Hawn taking over as coach of an Inner City high school football team. Film debut for both Woody Harrelson and Wesley Snipes. 

Gung Ho – Michael Keaton stars with Gedde Watanabe as a car plant manager trying to save his workers jobs following a Japanese takeover.

Stars: Kurt Russell, Kim Cattrall, Dennis Dun 

Director: John Carpenter 

Remember, this is my site and I decide what fits into the parameters. While not traditionally talked about in horror circles, there are enough horror moments in this film for me. 

Brief synopsis: 

Bus driver Egg Chen is being deposed by a lawyer regarding an incident in Chinatown and a ton of property damage done during it. Egg is relaxed until the lawyer mentions Jack Burton and he tells the man to leave Jack alone. Egg then explains that there are things that the lawyer doesn’t understand and creates green lightning between his hands before starting his tale. 

Spoilers below (you have been warned): 

Jack is a divorced truck driver who visits Chinatown on his latest run. He meets up with his old friend Wang Chi for some drinks and gambling. Jack ends up winning a bunch of money and chooses to follow Wang until he receives his money. Jack goes with Wang to the airport to pick up Wang’s fiancée, Miao Yin. Jack runs into and flirts with intrepid and pretty lawyer Gracie Law who is waiting for her contact from China, Tara. Tara is arriving on the same plane as Miao Yin and is meeting with Gracie to help take down crime lord Lo Pan. Lo Pan sends out his gang to kidnap Tara but Jack, in his own inept way, interferes. In the confusion, Miao Yin is kidnapped instead. Wang and Jack take off in his truck to rescue the woman but end up stuck in a fight in an alley in the middle of a Chinatown funeral after a fight breaks out between two rival gangs. Then Jack watches in amazement as three men descend from the sky and begin attacking the gangs. These men are the three storms and work for Lo Pan. Jack tries to escape in his truck by running them over but another man appears, seemingly floating on air. This ghostly figure emits a bright light from his eyes and mouth, blinding Jack. Wang leads the men out of the alley and back to his restaurant on foot but Jack’s truck, the Pork Chop Express, is left behind in the process. 

At Wang’s restaurant, Jack recovers his eyesight and attempts to file a claim on his truck. Wang’s friend Eddie enters and lets Jack know that the Lords of Death, Lo Pan’s gang, have taken the truck. Gracie also arrives to help. They surmise that Miao Yin has been taken to a local brothel run by Lo Pan to be sold and that she will receive a high price because she has green eyes, a rarity in Asian women. The group makes a plan to send Jack in as a man looking for a good time and that he will help them find Miao Yin and save her. While Jack acts like a buffoon in the brothel, Gracie meets up with a local reporter named Margo who is doing an expose on David Lo Pan, the human version of the ghost man. Jack asks for a green-eyed woman but is told that Asian women do no have green eyes. Jack ends up in a room with a woman but she is tight lipped about the girls in the brothel. Suddenly, the three storms break into the brothel and escape with Miao Yin. 

Jack and Wang decide that the next step is to infiltrate one of Lo Pan’s businesses posing as telephone repair men. The get into the business but are fooling no one and quickly get captured. They meet David Lo Pan, Lo Pan’s human form, who is a weak, old man in a wheelchair. He explains he was cursed and needs a girl with green eyes to break the curse. He must marry the girl with green eyes and then sacrifice her to appease the gods. He plans on using Miao Yin to complete the ritual and return to normal human form. Jack and Wang are locked up but through misadventure, they escape. Meanwhile, Gracie and her team end up at the same business and are also kidnapped. They are held with other women who are being human trafficked. Jack and Wang help them escape. Egg, who has been brought into the fold, is waiting outside with his tour bus as the group escapes. Unfortunately, Gracie’s curiosity gets the best of her and she gets kidnapped by a rogue monster who drags her back to his lair. Lo Pan enters and finds Gracie, who also has green eyes, and cackles with delight. After they both pass the Test of the Burning Blade, Lo Pan decides to marry both women, sacrifice Gracie, and live out his life with Miao Yin. 

Wang, Jack, and Egg Chen get a group together to stop Lo Pan. After multiple fights and incidents, including one where Jack knocks himself out, the group finally makes their way out of Lo Pan’s lair into the business they were in before. Lo Pan has already completed the first part of the ritual, which makes him flesh and blood, and is about to sacrifice Miao Yin when Jack and the gang stop him. Jack kills Lo Pan. They are trying to find a way to escape when they stumble upon Jack’s truck and use it to flee the exploding building. 

They head back to the restaurant. After a joyful reunion with Miao Yin, Wang pays Jack the money he owes him. Margo and Eddie are now together and Egg is taking a vacation. Gracie watches Jack leave with the hope that he will come back for her someday. Jack gets on his CB and starts talking with his fellow truckers on his CB radio, telling them to “Just remember what ol' Jack Burton does when the earth quakes, and the poison arrows fall from the sky, and the pillars of Heaven shake. Yeah, Jack Burton just looks that big ol' storm right square in the eye and he says, "Give me your best shot, pal. I can take it." Hopefully Jack means it as the creature that kidnapped Gracie is seen climbing up from behind the cab, having hitched a ride on the old Pork Chop Express. 

My thoughts (with spoilers): 

There are certain films that defy genre classification and Big Trouble in Little China is definitely one of them. This film has elements of multiple genres, including horror, action, sci-fi, and comedy. This is a difficult job to pull off but Carpenter handles it all beautifully. Underappreciated in its day and, much like The Thing, it ended up becoming a cult classic. It is also the reason John Carpenter stepped away from mainstream studios as they marketed the film poorly during a very busy summer season. Carpenter’s idea was to have the sidekick be the actual hero of the film. This conceit only works if the lead is charismatic with a sense of humor about themselves. Carpenter smartly reteamed with Kurt Russell who plays Jack Burton perfectly. He is a buffoon, always getting in his own way, and not nearly as charming as he thinks he is. Yet all of these things endear him to the audience. Despite his blustering, he has a heart of gold and wants to help Wang rescue Maio Yin. He likes Gracie but is wise enough to know that they cannot be together in the end. Russell plays each note perfectly. There is a wink and a smile in his performance – he knows he is actually Wang’s sidekick and he is fine with it. 

Carpenter’s script is smart and cohesive. He starts the film off with Egg and his magical abilities. This allows the audience to accept the insanity of the next 90 minutes because it is established early on that this is a magical world. We can accept flying men and ghostly figures because we are told in the first five minutes that this is in the film’s world. Another fun little set-up is Jack bragging about his reflexes. We see Jack stop a bottle from hitting him and grab it in midair. This pays off in the end as, after numerous and embarrassing encounters including knocking himself out, Jack throws his knife at Lo Pan. He misses horribly and Lo Pan throws the knife back at him. This is where the reflexes come in to play as Jack grabs the knife in the air and throws it right back into Lo Pan’s head. This might have seem out of character for the man we have been watching if not for the scene with the bottle. 

Russell is ably supported by his castmates. Dennis Dun, who would appear next year in Carpenter’s Prince of Darkness, is a gem as Wang. Funny and with great athletic ability, it is a shame he was not better utilized in the film community. Victor Wong is a classic character actor who brings humor to the character of Egg Chen. James Hong, who played Lo Pan, is still working today and for good reason. His Lo Pan is a creepy little villain whether in old man makeup or as the ghostly presence. Hong understands the film he is in and knows just how to tweak his lines for the best effective. Unfortunately, the female characters in the film get the short shrift. Cattrall is fine as Gracie but we never really understand what she is hoping to accomplish. She comes off as more of a reporter than lawyer honestly. Margo is fun but ultimately unnecessary. And poor Miao Yin is just a plot device and nothing more. 

Still, this film is a fun thrill ride that never leaves you bored or looking at your watch. The monsters are inventive, fun, and creepy. The villain is devious and scary. The violence is cartoonish in a Looney Tunes kind of way – think silly explosions and people flying through the air but very little in actual blood and guts. And the humor is perfect, especially every jab thrown Jack’s way. If you are looking for a fun time, you can’t go wrong with this film.    

More films from 1986 to check out: 

The Hitcher – Great little thriller starring the late Rutger Hauer and the titular Hitcher. This is why we don’t pick up hitchhikers kiddies. 

SpaceCamp – Bad timing killed this film as it came out after the Challenger exploded and no one wanted to watch a film about a doomed space shuttle flight after that, especially with kids in danger. This is a great cast and the premise is fun. Hard to find but worth the watch once you get your hands on it. 

Ferris Bueller’s Day Off – 80’s classic about a kid who just wants to have some fun with his friends but school keeps getting in the way. Honestly, this film is much more fun if you are a teenager because as an adult, I find Ferris a little annoying. Alan Ruck steals the film as Ferris’s wingman Cameron.

Stars: Thom Matthews, Jennifer Cooke 

Director: Tom McLoughlin

1985 was a great year for film but not necessarily for the horror film. 1986, on the other hand, got back into form and we start with my favorite Friday the 13^th film of all time. 

Brief synopsis: 

A now grown Tommy Jarvis has just been released from a psychiatric hospital and his first stop is Forest Green, the new name of Crystal Lake. In what is probably the smartest move the town council has made, the town changed its name to try and escape the notoriety of Jason Voorhees. It might have worked had Tommy not dug up the grave and, with the help of an iron rod and lightning, resurrected the killer. The man behind the mask is back and he wants to make up for lost time. 

Spoilers below (you have been warned):

Jason kills Tommy’s friend but Tommy escapes. He runs straight to the police station but no one believes him. Instead, they lock Tommy up for disturbing the peace. Meanwhile, Jason’s killing spree begins. He starts off with the lead counselors who are killed on the road to Camp Forest Green. The next morning, the counselors come to the station to report their missing comrades. The group is led by Megan Garris, who also happens to be the Sherriff’s daughter. Tommy tells them from his cell that Jason killed their friends but the Sherriff waves him off as a crazy man and reminds his daughter that Jason is just a legend and sends the counselors back to camp. Sherriff Garris then releases Tommy so he can send him out of town and away from his daughter. Tommy breaks from the escort and leads the small parade to the cemetery only to find Jason’s grave filled in. Garris then literally throws Tommy out of town and warns him to never return again. 

Meanwhile, Megan and her friends attempt to set up camp and face something far scarier than Jason – actual children. Yes, this is the first and only time we see children attending camp in a Friday the 13^th movie and they are a snarky little group. The day seems to go well and the counselors manage to complete all the activities and get the children fed and to bed. That is because Jason is busy killing paint ballers on a corporate retreat, a newly engaged couple, and the cemetery caretaker. One of the counselors, Cort, goes on a date with a woman in an RV and they both end up killed. Megan goes to the police station to see if her dad has heard anything about the other counselors but he is busy going to the crime scene of the last murder and instructs his daughter to stay there. She is hanging out there when Tommy calls to try and get the police to help him trap Jason. She decides to help him. 

The young couple lead the police on a brief police chase but are quickly caught and brought back to the station. The Sherriff tries to pin the murders on Tommy but Megan insists that isn’t possible because Tommy was with her during the murders. Megan breaks Tommy out of jail and they head to the camp, positive that is where he will be headed and they are right. Jason makes quick work of the counselors and then the police after the arrive. Tommy gets chains and a large rock into a boat, hoping to return Jason to his rightful resting place – the lake. He goes out on a boat and lures Jason out there, saving Megan’s life. Tommy sets fire to the lake and, after a brief battle, manages to get the chain around Jason’s neck and throws the boulder overboard. Jason is dragged to the bottom of the lake but grabs Tommy on the way down. Megan swims out and uses the boat motor on Jason’s head. He lets go of Tommy. Megan brings Tommy to shore and uses CPR to save his life. Jason is shown tied to the bottom of the lake, undead and unable to escape. 

My thoughts (with spoilers):

I said at the beginning that this is my favorite of the series and I stand by that. This film is fun with a twisted sense of humor and an ability to laugh at itself. This isn’t going to win any awards but if I am looking for a Friday the 13^th film, this is usually my go to. 

The writer and director understood that these film series had been going on for a long time and that the formula needed shaking up. His choice was to add humor and self-awareness to the script. This is probably the best Friday the 13^th script of the series. The choice to have actual campers at the camp adds a little bit of tension to the movie and some snarkiness. These kids aren’t afraid to say what is on their minds. One kid in particular seems to have the wryest sense of humor. At one point, Megan is screaming as she runs around looking for help. The kids are all hiding under their beds and he goes, “so what were you going to be when you grew up?”. This is my kind of humor and it is there throughout the script. McLoughlin recognized the absurdity of the whole set-up and leaned into it. 

The acting is decent for a Friday the 13^th film. Let’s face it, you are not expecting award-winning actors here, just people able to deliver their lines in a slightly believable way. This film is the debut of Tony Goldwyn, who was a few years out from being the bad guy in Ghost. Renee Jones as counselor Sissy had a prominent role in Days of Our Lives for years as Lexie Carver. Jennifer Cooke was just coming off the short-lived series “V” where she played Elizabeth - a human/alien hybrid, and Thom Mathews appeared in Return of the Living Dead. They play their parts well and really embrace the comedy portions of the script. CJ Graham is a formidable Jason and I like his take on the lumbering killer. 

But the thing that probably put this film over the others in this series, for me, is that this is the only one with an actual theme song. Alice Cooper wrote and performed the killer track “He’s Back (The Man Behind The Mask)” and also contributed his songs “Teenage Frankenstein” and “Hard Rock Summer” to the movie. Cooper’s “He’s Back” is probably tied for my favorite horror rock song from the 80’s, the other one being “Pet Semetary” by the Ramones. Fun fact: I am part of the Now Playing Facebook group (shout out to my fellow members) and I had a poll asking if people preferred this or “Dream Warriors” by Dokken. Cooper won by a smidge. 

I can honestly say that if you are going to watch just one Friday the 13^th film, I highly recommend it be this one. Some people prefer Part 4 but it lacks the self-awareness and fun of this one. Added note, do yourself a favor and never watch Part 5 – it is truly terrible. 

More films from 1986 to check out:

The Great Mouse Detective – Underrated Disney film that is the mouse version of Sherlock Holmes. Vincent Price has a ball as the villain, Ratigan, just don’t call him a rat. 

Back to School – Rodney Dangerfield plays a successful man who never got his degree. Desperate to improve his relationship with his son following a disastrous marriage to the stepmom, he bribes his way into school to spend more time with him. The son is played by Keith Gordon from Christine and his roommate is a pre-Ironman Robert Downey Jr. 

Star Trek IV: The Voyage Home – my personal favorite of the series even if I know it is not as good as Star Trek II. The crew of the Enterprise time travels to Earth in the 1980’s to bring back an extinct animal. The cast has fun with the fish out of water circumstances and it helped reset the franchise, at least until the disastrous part 5.

Stars: Corey Haim, Megan Follows, Gary Busey

Director: Dan Attias 

A small town finds its residents dying in violent ways but who, or what, is doing the killing? 

Brief synopsis: 

Marty Coslaw and his sister Janey live in Tarker’s Mill a typical Maine small town. Unfortunately, the Coslaw’s are not your typical family. Marty is younger than Janey and was born unable to walk. Because of this, Janey feels like the put-upon sister who has to help her brother no matter how she feels. The teens have a close relationship with their alcoholic Uncle Red, much to the mother’s dismay. She feels that an alcoholic with multiple divorces is not a good role model for her children, no matter how much she loves her brother. 

Despite these setbacks, the family lives a relatively quiet life until a series of deaths begin to happen. The town drunk and railroad worker ends up decapitated during a shift. This is written off as an accident until unmarried and pregnant Stella is attacked and killed in the middle of her attempted suicide. The violent scene makes it clear that this was no accident. The town goes on lockdown and starts a curfew, unaware that the culprit is a local wolf in sheep’s clothing, culling their little flock one by one. 

Spoilers below (you have been warned):

Marty begins a small flirtation with the strangely Southern speaking Tammy whose father is killed by something in their storage shed. Shortly after, her mother moves away. Hoping to cheer his nephew up, Red builds the Silver Bullet for him. This is an electric wheelchair that is almost a motorcycle, needing gas and going fast. Marty’s friend Grady ignores the town curfew to fly a kite and ends up another victim of the creature. Following Grady’s murder, a town posse sets off in the night to avenge the boy and ends up massacred as well. After these deaths, the town festival and fireworks are cancelled, Red gives Marty fireworks of his own to set off. Marty sneaks out of his room one night to set them off and comes across the werewolf. He sets off one of the fireworks and uses it to blind the creature in one eye. Marty then escapes back home. After Marty tells Janey what happened, she agrees to go around town and try to figure out who has a recent eye injury. 

Using the church charity drive as a cover, collecting bottles and cans for recycling fees, Janey makes her way around town but has nothing to show for it at the end of her quest except a grocery cart full of bottles and cans. She takes them to the church and vents to Reverend Lowe about her little brother and his wild tales. What Janey doesn’t know is that the man she venting to is sporting an eye patch. As she drops off her stash to his garage, she falls and lands in the previous donations and finds a broken bat from one of the men in the posse hidden under the cans. Lowe comes in and Janey realizes he is the werewolf. She quickly escapes and heads home to tell her brother what she has discovered. 

At first, they try to stop the werewolf by sending anonymous letters encouraging Lowe to end his life. This fails miserably and Lowe chases Marty in his car, ramming the wheelchair a few times, into a condemned bridge. Lowe claims that he cannot kill himself as it is a sin and that the people he killed were in moral danger and he saved their souls. Lowe is about to attack Marty when the boy gets the attention of a passing farmer and Lowe escapes. 

The children finally tell their uncle everything who doesn’t believe what they are saying until Red sees paint from Lowe’s car on a dent in the Silver Bullet. He goes to the sheriff and convinces him to at least check Lowe out. This is a mistake as Lowe ends up killing the sheriff. Red then takes the children’s crosses and has a silver bullet made. He then arranges for his sister and her husband to take a trip on the next full moon and lies in wait with the children for the attack they know is coming. Just when Red starts doubting that the kids are telling the truth, the werewolf attacks. Marty gets the gun and manages to kill the werewolf. 

My thoughts (with spoilers): 

This is my chance to remind you that this is not a list of the best horror films, it is my personal list of favorite horror films. Not all of them are good, some of them are silly or a little slow, but I like them for many different reasons. Silver Bullet is not a great horror film but something about it keeps me watching it at least once every few years. It may be because it actually adds something to the werewolf mythology. Marty theorizes that Lowe may not be a werewolf all the time but reaches full power at the full moon, growing more and more “wolfy” as the moon waxes and wanes. It is an interesting idea that a better made film could expand on. 

I also like the religious aspect of having a preacher being the werewolf. Lowe seems like a good man trying his best to tend to his flock of worshippers but he is the thing they should be fearing. Religious leaders often get overlooked for crimes because they are men of God, a title some use to avoid suspicion. Lowe takes it even further by trying to use his position as justification for his killing. After all, these people all had moral flaws that would keep them out of heaven. Killing them saved them from going to hell. It is a twisted motivation that we sadly see in the real world all the time. 

The acting is good, not great. Corey Haim is believable as a paraplegic. He moves well in and out of the chair and manages to make you believe his legs do not work. Megan Follows would find greater acclaim as Anne of Green Gables but you believe her as Marty’s put-upon sister. Yes, he annoyed her but she still loved him. Gary Busey is having a ball as Red. He loves a drink but, when they need him, he puts the bottle down and steps up for the kids. Everett McGill does a good job as the Reverend but nothing special. Once we realize he is the villain, he leans a little too much into the evil part, especially for a reverend. There is not a lot of conflict once he is outed – he is the bad guy and that is it. 

Again, this is not a great film but it is fun and worth at least one watch. Maybe throw it into the Halloween rotation once every few years for something just a little different. 

More films from 1985 to check out: 

Clue – If you haven’t seen this yet, what is wrong with you? A masterclass of comedic acting with standout performances by Tim Curry and Madeline Kahn. Stop reading and go watch this film now – all of the others on this list can wait. 

The New Kids – Underrated little thriller starring James Spader, Lori Loughlin, and Eric Stoltz. A recently orphaned brother and sister move in with their uncle who is fixing up an amusement park. The teens attend school and get on the bad side of the local high school gang. Nothing groundbreaking but still fun. 

The Breakfast Club – Classic film about different teen archetypes bonding during Saturday detention. A must see for any teenager of any generation. 

Desperately Seeking Susan – Madonna and Rosanna Arquette star in this romantic comedy about a bored housewife who follows the story of a Susan, played by Madonna, through personal ads in a newspaper. Eventually, their paths and stories cross. Madonna breezes through this with what is probably her best performance in a film. 

Ladyhawke – Rutger Hauer and Michelle Pfeiffer play star-crossed lovers under a curse. Matthew Broderick is the thief drawn into the story and tries to help them break the curse. 

Real Genius – Hilarious college comedy starring Val Kilmer as a lazy genius who tries to stop his new roommate from being too serious. So many fun gags. 

Better Off Dead – John Cusack is a teen who is not dealing well with his recent break up. Absurdist comedy with so many familiar faces and classic lines. 

Smooth Talk – Laura Dern stars as Connie, a teenager who is just discovering her sexuality. Unfortunately, so is older creep Arnold A. Friend. The second half of the film is tense as Arnold tries to convince Connie to let him into her empty house.

Stars: Chris Sarandon, Roddy McDowell, William Ragsdale 

Director: Tom Holland 

A teenager learns what happens when you peek into the wrong neighbor’s window… 

Brief synopsis: 

Charlie Brewster is a regular teen boy. He has a steady girlfriend, Amy, but she refuses to go beyond heavy petting, a situation that is a cause of frustration for him. His best friend is Evil Ed, a horror movie geek, and his mom is single and working a job that changes shifts on a regular basis. He is also a regular viewer of the Peter Vincent show “Fright Night” and has a great affection for his films. But one day he gets a new neighbor named Jerry Dandridge who soon begins to take a bite out of their little town… 

Spoilers below (you have been warned): 

Charlie watches Jerry and his roommate, Billy, move in with what looks like a coffin among other relics. Several nights later, a sex worker shows up at the house and Charlie hears a bloodcurdling scream later while he is studying.  Amy comes to talk to him at a diner later but he is distracted by a news report about the same woman having been found murdered. Amy smashes a sloppy joe into his face and leaves him behind with a laughing Ed. Charlie tries to investigate the house but is stopped by Billy. 

Later that night, Charlie is doing surveillance on Jerry’s house and sees him with another woman. Suddenly Jerry reveals sharp fangs and is about to bite the woman when he notices Charlie watching them. Jerry draws the shade while Charlie runs to tell his mom what is happening but she just thinks it is a dream. Charlie runs out to see what is going on at the neighbors and sees a shadow fly down and land in the trees, turning into Jerry. Jerry hands the woman’s purse to Billy who is putting the body into a truck. Charlie’s mom comes out yelling for her son blowing his cover. Charlie grabs his mom and drags her into their house. He tries to tell his mom what happened but she doesn’t believe him. He next tries Amy and gets the same result. Frustrated, he goes to the police and tells them about the two women who entered the house and ended up dead. It does not go well and the officer leaves once Charlie brings up vampires. 

Charlie then goes to visit Ed and is reminded that Jerry cannot enter his house without an invitation from the owner. Unfortunately, Charlie’s single mom thinks Jerry is attractive (she is not wrong) and invites him over for drinks. Jerry smiles at Charlie as he remarks that now he may stop over anytime, a threat that he follows through on that night. Jerry threatens Charlie, telling him that he is giving Charlie the choice of forgetting that he is a vampire. Charlie manages to stab Jerry in the hand with a pencil, stopping the attack. Jerry flees but warns Charlie he will be back tomorrow night. 

Charlie finally reaches out to a newly fired Peter Vincent but he thinks the boy is insane and quickly brushes him off. Out of options, he goes home and protects himself as best he can, surrounding himself with cloves of garlic, crucifixes, and begins making wooden stakes. Amy and Ed, who think Charlie is totally crazy, convince Charlie to stay in his fortified room while they talk to Peter Vincent themselves. The two teenagers manage to bribe the old actor into agreeing to a “vampire test” and work with Jerry to set everything up. Satisfied that Charlie will soon be out of their hair without having to resort to violence, Jerry and Billy decide to stay in and leave Charlie alone for the night. 

The next night, Peter comes in with holy water but it is just regular tap water. They perform the test and Charlie tries to deny it was real. While the teenagers talk to Jerry, Peter pulls out an old prop from one of his movies, a cigarette case with a mirror. To his shock, Jerry does not cast a reflection and Peter drops the case, breaking the mirror. At the same time, Charlie sees a painting that looks like a blonde Amy. Both Charlie and Peter leave in a hurry, dragging Ed and Amy with them. Charlie confronts Peter who admits that Jerry did not have a reflection in the mirror before driving off. Charlie, more certain than ever that Jerry is a vampire, insists Ed comes with him to take Amy home. Back in the house, Jerry steps on a piece of mirror that came from the cigarette case and realizes that Peter knows truth. 

Ed continues to mock the idea that Jerry is a vampire and decides to take a short cut down a dark alley. Jerry commiserates with the outsider and turns him into a vampire. Amy and Charlie hear the scream and assume Ed is just messing around until Jerry appears on the sidewalk following them. They make their way to a club and attempt to get in touch with Peter, even though Amy confesses that she paid Peter to fake the test. As Charlie makes the call, Jerry appears and dances with the virginal girl, bringing her under his thrall. After killing the bouncers, Jerry takes advantage of the chaos to kidnap Amy. Ed makes his way to Peter Vincent’s apartment. Peter makes the mistake of inviting the young man in only to discover he is a vampire. He uses a prop crucifix to burn the sign of the cross into the new vampire’s head. Ed runs off swearing that Jerry will make him pay. 

Charlie makes his way to Peter’s and, after proving he is not a vampire, begs him to come to Jerry’s house and kill the vampire. He refuses at first but eventually meets up with Charlie at Jerry’s house to end the vampire menace. While all this is going on, Jerry completes his seduction of Amy. He bites her and then takes her virginity. The two vampire hunters enter the house and begin to climb up the stairs. Jerry appears and Peter brandishes his crucifix. At first Jerry is scared but then he just laughs, telling Peter that without faith, it will not work on him. Charlie jumps in and successfully uses the weapon however he is quickly thrown over the stairs by Billy who is not a vampire but an assistant of some sort – think Renfield. Scared, Peter runs next door to try and get help from Charlie’s mom, not aware that she is working the night shift and not home. Instead, Ed is waiting for him and they fight. Ed turns into a wolf and Peter stabs him through the heart, seemingly killing him. Peter removes the stake from Ed and heads back over to Jerry’s house, his faith and courage restored. He finds Charlie with Amy, who is slowly turning into a vampire and changing into a version of Jerry’s lost love. 

Eventually they kill Billy and chase Jerry into the basement where his coffin is. Peter closes the coffin, stopping Jerry from reaching his hiding spot, while Charlie deals with a now monstrous Amy. They accidentally break one of the blacked-out windows and realize that the sun is up. Charlie and Peter break all of the windows and the room fills with sunlight, killing Jerry. No longer under Jerry’s influence, Amy returns to normal. 

A few nights later, Charlie and Amy are making out in his bed while Fright Night comes on, once again hosted by Peter Vincent. He throws on an old schlocky movie instead of a vampire film. Charlie is making his way to his bed when he thinks he sees a pair of glowing eyes in Jerry’s house but they quickly disappear. Charlie jumps on the bed to sleep with Amy while we hear in Ed in the background tell Charlie “(y)ou’re so cool Brewster.” 

My thoughts (with spoilers): 

The summer of 1985 was a rough one for me. I started out the summer falling off my bike and getting stitches in my right arm. Two months later I was visiting my maternal Grandma and fell, breaking the same arm. Yeah, not fun. But I also got to see my first rated “R” film in the theater, Fright Night. We went the day I got my cast off and, given that the cast had gone above my elbow, the muscles were all tight and still needed to loosen up. That meant I spent the entire film trying to cover my eyes and couldn’t, which turned out to be a blessing in disguise because if I had, I would have missed so much of a great film.

 Vampires were passe in the 1980’s, with very few films being produced and even fewer of those films being any good. Fright Night is an example of how to do the genre right. The premise is basically Rear Window with vampires. Charlie sees a murder and then spends the rest of the film trying to convince everyone, including his girlfriend, that he is not crazy. In the end he saves the girl and is the hero but the journey is what is important and what a journey it is. 

I will say that Holland's script is mostly great but it does play fast and loose with the vampire rules. The big ones are there: wooden stakes or sunlight being the best ways to kill them, the use of the vampire’s charisma to hold someone in thrall, and the fear of crucifixes. However, they play fast and loose with how someone becomes a vampire. For instance, Ed is immediately turned into a vampire after being bitten but Amy slowly transitions. And if Peter hadn’t staked Ed, would he have turned human again with Jerry’s death? What is the rule for that? Let’s not even get into Billy because there does not seem to be a consensus on what he is. He walks around in sunlight and turns into green goo and sand as he dies so I always assumed he was a zombie but I have read that writer/director Holland intended him to be another vampire in transition so who knows? 

The acting is great all around. Chris Sarandon is charming and charismatic as the vampire Jerry. You can see why all the women have no issue being bitten by him. Sarandon is often eating fruit, a little quirk he added to show he was descended from a fruit bat. It is a small detail but shows how committed he was to the character. William Ragsdale has not done much notable work since this film but he is a great everyman, a kid who loves horror films but not as much as the thought of having sex with Amy. He isn’t the most popular guy but he tries his best to do the right thing and stop Jerry. Amy is nice but not a pushover. She loves Charlie and is torn between wanting to believe him and wanting to get him the help she thinks he needs. Amanda Bearse has a nice girl-next-door quality and you can believe that her and Charlie are a real high school couple. Stephen Geoffreys plays Evil Ed with an underlying sense of sadness and longing for a place in this world. We get why he agrees to be turned by Jerry; he feels alone even when he is with his friend. 

And Roddy McDowell is pitch perfect as horror film host Peter Vincent. A combination of Peter Cushing and Vincent Price, with a little Christopher Lee thrown in, he is a relic trying to survive in the modern age. His movies, homages to the classic Hammer Films, were over the top and contained enough fake blood to be considered shocking in their day. However, the newer generation wants slashers and blood, something he cannot comprehend or understand. Peter eventually learns to let the past sleep after defeating Jerry, earning a new perspective and his job back. 

In many ways, Fright Night is like Peter, an old voice struggling to be heard in a new age. Jason, Freddy, and Michael were the new boogeymen, replacing Dracula, Frankenstein, and the Wolf Man. Special effects, blood, and gore were on the rise, as well as sex scenes instead of innuendo. Fright Night manages to fit in by embracing some of these new components of a horror film and mixing them with the old school charm. When Jerry takes Amy’s virginity, we do not see them have sex after he bites her, it is implied through her sounds as the scene fades out. There is very little in terms of nudity or sex in the film period. However, the special effects are quite good. We get a good amount of blood through the nightclub scene and the transformations of Jerry, Ed, and Amy are quite good. Compared to the Terrifiers and Saw films of today, the effects are quite tame, but they were shocking in the 1980’s. 

One final thing to note is the score of the film. Soundtracks really found their groove in the 80’s, going from a thing only true fans buy to selling millions of copies. Think of Footloose, Purple Rain, Flashdance, Top Gun, and Caddyshack, films that made a nice profit on their soundtracks along with the films themselves. Not only that but, thanks to composers like John Williams and John Carpenter, movie scores had also become popular. Star Wars, E.T., Halloween, Friday the 13^th, and Jaws all had memorable scores that not only heightened the mood of the film but also the tension. These composers used their skill to work with the director and improve on the film. The standout track on Brad Fiedel’s score is “Come to Me”, which is basically Jerry’s seduction theme. Smooth and sexy with an ethereal feel, it conveys Jerry’s seduction perfectly. Fiedel has some great scores including Terminator 2: Judgement Day and True Lies so it is a shame he is not a more well-known name. 

Fright Night is a great update on the classic vampire film. It is scary without being too gory and has a wry sense of humor. Definitely one to add to your yearly Halloween rotation. 

More films from 1985 to check out: 

The Goonies – Adventure film about a group of kids who are trying to save their parents home by going on a treasure hunt. Along the way, they cross paths with a trio of bungling criminals. Includes future stars Sean Astin, Josh Broland, Ke Huy Quan, and Martha Plimpton. Still a favorite and loved by my kids and grandkids.   

Girls Just Want to Have Fun – Cheesy dance movie starring Sarah Jessica Parker, Helen Hunt, Shannon Doherty, and Jonathan Silverman. SJP is Janey an Army brat and Catholic school girl who just loves to dance and makes friends with eccentric Hunt. Hijinks ensue as Janey tries to land a spot as a regular dancer on Dance TV. The soundtrack is amazing. 

Back to the Future – The film that put Michael J. Fox on the map and is still a great time. Teenager with a nuclear scientist friend, which is a totally normal thing for a teenager to have, gets sent back in time and accidentally stops his parents from meeting. A classic and the inspiration for a great John Mulaney bit.

Stars: Catherine Mary Stewart, Kelli Maroney, Robert Beltran 

Director: Thom Eberhardt 

What do you get when you throw a couple of teen girls into an apocalypse? An underappreciated horror/sci-fi/comedy cult classic… 

Brief synopsis: 

65 million years ago, a comet passed by Earth, coinciding with the extinction of the dinosaurs. That same comet is making a return tonight and the whole world is out and celebrating except for teenager sisters Sam and Reggie in Los Angeles. Sam had gotten into a fight with their stepmother Doris and ran away, spending the night in a steel shed. Reggie spent the night in a steel lined projection booth with her boyfriend Larry. When they wake up the next morning, their entire lives are changed… 

Spoilers below (you have been warned): 

Larry goes out in the morning to find a friend who never came by and is killed by a zombie-like man. Reggie gets accidentally locked out of the movie theater and encounters the same creature. She manages to fight him off and escapes across a now empty Los Angeles. She finds Sam at home and tries to convince her something is wrong, pointing out that the streets are now covered in clothes and red dust. Everyone is gone, turned into dust, and they are alone. At least they think they are alone until they hear the DJ on the radio from a local station. 

The girls head to the station and discover that what they were hearing was prerecorded but they do run into a trucker named Hector. He tells them that he and a girl he picked up slept in the back of his truck that night. When they woke up in the morning, she freaked out and ran off. He tried to find her but she was being eaten by some zombies and he couldn’t save her. Reggie becomes upset as she realizes that must be what happened to her boyfriend but eventually recovers, realizing that they have bigger issues to deal with. She explains that Sam still believes that their father, a military man, will come save them but Reggie knows that this happened all over the world and the reality is that their father is probably gone. Hector and Reggie spend a few cute moments together while Sam watches jealously. Sam decides to kill time by playing DJ and receives a phone call. She grabs her sister and Hector and says that the call came from scientists who said that the comet killed everyone who were outside but some people were only partially exposed and are dying. These people are the zombies the trio had recently encountered. Hector decides to go and see his mother, futilely hoping she survived the comet. He leaves the sisters but promises to return. 

Reggie and Sam practice shooting guns to defend themselves against the zombies. After a brief fight over Reggie claiming a man who could possibly be the last man on Earth, they do what teenage girls in the 80’s did to unwind – they head to the mall. After all, the stores are open and free of charge now. They have a fun musical montage before a group of zombified stock room boys attack, taking the two young girls hostage. The leader of the zombies plays Russian Roulette with them until the scientists come to the rescue. Reggie goes with the group to the base while Sam stays behind at the radio station with two scientists to wait for Hector. Scientist Audrey White gives Sam a shot to deal with a nasty rash she has developed. Sam claims that she gets nervous rashes before she seemingly dies. Audrey then turns and shoots the other scientist dead. 

Reggie is answering questions at the base and getting increasingly unnerved by the scientist’s questions. After being told that Sam is dead, she tries to escape. As she makes her way through the base, she finds a room with numerous brain dead people who seem to kept alive as blood donors. She manages to grab a gun and stumbles upon two children who were being told to take a gas sedative so they can go to the North Pole and see Santa Clause. The attendants also show signs of memory loss as they cannot remember the specific details of their job. Meanwhile, Hector arrives at the radio station to find Audrey waiting for him. She explains that their group left the vents open at the base to expose themselves minimally to the comet. They were hoping to create a cure through the survivors blood but they had not had any luck yet and they were slowly dying. Audrey then kills herself. 

Reggie continues trying to escape the base with the kids. Hector arrives at the base in a convertible and calls over a guard. He then shows the guard Sam in the trunk and explains that she isn’t dead, just sedated. Sam then grabs the guard and they knock him out. They meet up with Reggie and the kids and escape, blowing up the base in the process. The new family then drives away, back to Los Angeles. Rain comes and washes away all the red dust, cleaning up the town. Reggie and Hector become a couple, raising the children they found at the base. Sam meets up with a fellow survivor and drives off with him but not before promising to be home early because “the whole burden of civilization is on us.” 

My thoughts (with spoilers): 

An underrated film that did okay at the box office but became a cult classic on video, Night of the Comet is witty, fun, and a wild ride. The acting is excellent and the script is sharp and funny. For example, when Reggie is trying to explain to Sam what is going on, Sam’s response is complete disbelief. Recognizing that her sister is in denial, Reggie gives her a reality check and drags her out of the house to see the emptiness outside. She screams at her sister “It’s Saturday morning Sam, where are the goddamn kids?”. It may not be true now but on Saturdays as a kid, I was outside right after breakfast and did not come back in until the street lights came on. The fact that there were no kids out at all really points to the emptiness of this new world. Reggie then picks up a shoe and dumps out a bunch of red dust. “Here’s Chuck.” Boom – no need for any other explanation, just a two words and a simple visual. Our characters are now caught up on their new reality. 

The sister’s chemistry is great. You believe that Catherine Mary Stewart (Reggie) and Kelli Maroney (Sam) are sisters who bicker and fight but still love each other at the end of the day. Sam complains that Reggie has stolen every boy she ever liked and how she has stolen Hector but you can see in her eyes she doesn’t mean it. This is a 16-year old who probably had a crush on her sister’s boyfriends and she could see Hector as maybe a chance to be more grown up. It quickly becomes clear that she doesn’t really feel that way as Sam was actually missing a young boy her age who she liked and lashing out to deal with it. It is relatable and understandable given the situation. Sam also gets the best line in the film. While the girls are practicing shooting at a car, the gun continuously jams. Frustrated, she hands the gun back to Reggie and says “Daddy would have gotten us Uzis.” Reggie gets a great comeback, noting that the now decimated car didn’t know the difference. 

Thom Eberhardt’s direction is great. This was a low budget film, only $700,000, and every penny is well-spent. He brings some interesting camera angles to different shots and manages to create a feeling that Los Angeles is completely empty. The film company shot at odd hours to get the best shots of empty streets and you really feel that these girls are alone in the world. The cast, even minor roles, is filled with recognizable actors. The special effects and make up are very good, not John Carpenter’s The Thing good, but well done given the budget. The filter used to give Los Angeles the red sky from the dust is used sparingly and every permit they got to shoot on the streets were well utilized. Those permits weren’t cheap but those shots were used in at least 25% of the film and make all the difference.

Night of the Comet is hidden gem that needs more exposure. In the year of Gremlins and Ghostbusters, this little film still managed to make over $14,000,000,000 at the box office – a huge return on the initial investment and that is not even including home video revenue. Seek it out and have a fun night with these Valley girls. 

More films from 1984 to check out: 

Beverly Hills Cop – Star making vehicle for Eddie Murphy. When his friend in murdered at his apartment in Detroit, Axel Foley heads to Bevely Hills to investigate.   

Firestarter – Okay Stephen King adaptation that was taken away from John Carpenter after The Thing flopped. Drew Barrymore does what she can with the material but I wonder how much better a Carpenter version of this film could have been. 

Indiana Jones and The Temple of Doom – Second outing of the hero and definitely in the middle of my rankings. Went gross-out instead of focusing on the story and I usually love Kate Capshaw but I detested Willie.   

Stars: Robert Englund, Heather Langenkamp, John Saxon 

Director: Wes Craven 

While Jason was dying in Crystal Lake, a new horror icon was being born on Elm Street… 

Brief synopsis: 

15-year-old Tina Gray is having a tough time. During the day she is stuck in a toxic relationship with her boyfriend Rod while her single mother seems more interested in her boyfriend than her daughter. She gets no relief at night as she is stalked by a badly burned man with knives on his fingers in her nightmares. Wanting a little support while her mom goes out of town, Tina invites her best friend Nancy and her boyfriend Glenn over for the night to keep her company. Nancy mentions she has also been nightmares of the same man. Rod crashes the party and, after sleeping with Tina, mentions that he has also been having nightmares. 

Sadly, Tina’s fears are proven well-founded. She falls asleep and is stalked by the nightmare man again but this time he succeeds in his attack and kills her. Rod is woken up by his sleeping girlfriend thrashing around on the bed and then suddenly getting cut from out of nowhere. As she magically crawls around the walls and ceiling, the blood continues to pour out as she dies. Rod, knowing he will be blamed for the death, jumps out the window while Nancy and Glenn discover Tina’s body. After calling the authorities, Nancy is questioned by Lieutenant Thompson who also happens to be her father and her mom’s, Marge, ex-husband. Nancy tells her father that Tina dreamed this was going to happen to her. 

Spoilers below (you have been warned): 

Nancy understandably does not get any sleep and, against her mother’s advice, decides to go to school to keep her mind busy. Her father uses her as bait to draw Rod out. Before he gets arrested, Rod tells Nancy that he thought he was having another nightmare. Nancy goes to school and falls asleep in class. She ends up in a boiler room with a badly burned man in a dirty red and green sweater who has finger knives. She wakes herself up by purposely burning her arm on one of the steam pipes. As she leaves school, she notices that her burn came with her from the nightmare. She talks to Rod in jail who describes the same man as the person haunting his nightmares. 

Nancy attempts to take a bath but falls asleep and the nightmare man attempts to drown her. She escapes and, realizing he is stalking her in her dreams, starts to take No-Doz pills to stay awake. Glenn breaks into her bedroom later that night and she asks him to watch her while she sleeps so she can attempt to see if the nightmare man is real. She falls asleep and finds the man attacking Rod in the jail. Nancy grabs a sleeping Glenn and runs to the jail but they are too late as Rod is found hung in his cell. Although his death is ruled a suicide, Nancy is convinced that he was murdered and refuses to sleep. Her mother Marge, who is using alcohol to cope with the whole situation, takes Nancy to a sleep clinic to try and help her sleep. 

At the clinic, Nancy is hooked up to multiple machines and falls asleep. While sitting with the technician, Marge asks him what dreams are and he admits no one really knows. Nancy slips into REM and the machines start going nuts as she is attacked by her nightmare. As she fights an unknown figure, she appears to convulse on the bed. Her mom and the workers at the clinic run in to wake her up and find that she has three slashes on her arm and a small section of her hair has turned gray from fright. Nancy also finds a dirty brown hat in the bed, grabbed off the head of her attacker. Marge takes Nancy home and calls her ex-husband to tell him of the existence of the hat while drinking her morning vodka. She then tries to hide it from her daughter but Nancy isn’t letting it go. She grabs the hat from the drawer and points out that the man’s name is in it – Fred Krueger. Nancy wants to know who Fred is but Marge insists that Nancy just needs to get some sleep. Nancy’s response is to grab her mom’s vodka bottle and smash it while yelling “screw sleep.” 

Nancy meets up with Glenn and they discuss dreams. Glenn mentions that the Malaysians and that, if they came across something evil in their dreams, they take away its power. He notices the book Nancy is carrying is called “Booby Traps and Other Anti-Personal Devices” and she explains that she is into survival. She leaves him and arrives home to find that her mother has barred all the windows on the house, making escape impossible. She confronts her mother who then takes her daughter to the basement and pulls a sack out of the furnace. In the sack is Freddy Krueger’s finger knives. Marge then explains that Freddy Krueger was a child murderer who was killed a dozen kids in the neighborhood. He was arrested but, due to legal snafu, the police were forced to let him go. The parents decided to take the law into their own hands and burned him to death in his house. Marge attempts to reassure her daughter that she can sleep now because “he's dead because Mommy killed him”. This is not the reassurance to Nancy the drunk Marge thought it was. 

Nancy talks to Glenn and they arrange to meet up later to try and catch Freddy by bringing him out of her dream. She also warns him that “whatever you do, don’t fall asleep”. Glenn does not listen and ends up pulled into his bed and turned into a geyser of blood shooting up out of the bed onto the ceiling. Nancy tries to get to him but Marge has locked the doors and hid the keys. Nancy calls her dad to verify that Glenn is dead and tells him that she is going to go to sleep and bring Freddy out into the real world. Lt. Thompson encourages his daughter to sleep and assigns an officer to watch the house. Nancy then puts her drunk mother to bed and goes to work booby trapping the house. She falls asleep and, when the alarm goes off, drags Freddy into the real world. They fight all over her house, ending in the basement where she douses him in gasoline, sets him on fire, and locks the door. She finally gets her father’s attention and his men break down the front door to help her. The group head to the basement but find Freddy has escaped. Nancy and her father follow the fiery footprints to her mother’s bedroom where they find the two in a tussle. They attempt to save Marge but are too late and the woman and Freddy both disappear into the bed. 

Nancy stays in the room alone and waits for Freddy to reappear. She tells him that she has figured out the secret and that everything she has experienced is one nightmare, none of it is real, and she wants her mother and friends back. Remembering what Glenn had told her previously, she tells him that she is taking away all his power. Freddy attempts to attack her but disappears into dust. Nancy opens the bedroom door and finds herself outside on a bright and sunny day. Glenn pulls up with Rod and Tina in his convertible to drive them to school while Marge tells her daughter that she is done with drinking. Nancy gets into the car and the red and green convertible top suddenly pops on, the doors lock, and the windows roll up without anyone doing anything. Trapped in the car, begs her mother for help but the woman just smiles and waves as the car pulls away. They last thing we see is Marge being pulled through the window on the front door by Freddy as little girls in white dresses jump rope and sing the iconic “One, two, Freddy’s coming for you…” nursery rhyme. 

My thoughts (with spoilers): 

This was one of my longer plot summaries and that is because this is one of the more complex horror movies of the 1980’s. Based on stories the late Wes Craven read about Hmong refugees who were tormented by nightmares and scared they would die in their sleep. They would drink coffee and take caffeine pills to stay awake but eventually sleep would win and they would die in their sleep. These stories would lead to one of the most successful horror film series of the 1980’s. Let’s face it, you have a chance of escaping from Michael or Jason if you can get away from Haddonfield or Crystal Lake but everyone has to sleep. No matter how hard you try, your body will force you to fall asleep. 

A little back story on me here – I lost my husband at a young age and had some problems with insomnia following his death. One day I was in the middle of a store when I suffered a grand mal seizure. I was told that basically my brain was sick of my not sleeping and decided if I wasn’t going to sleep willingly, it was going to make me. I learned my lesson and make sure I get at least some sleep at night and haven’t had a seizure since. You can try and fight sleep but, eventually, your body will always win that fight. And that is Freddy’s biggest advantage in the horror icons game – everyone has to sleep. 

Freddy was a departure from previous our previous horror madmen. Unlike Jason and Michael, Freddy was not content to just stalk you, he loved to play with his prey before he kills them. He enjoys the hunt, taunting the teens he will be attacking, scraping his weapon against anything that will give out that horrible screeching sound. He was a predator in life and his death only gave him more room to play and ways to play with the victims. Sure, he loves his boiler room but he also loves to get into your bedroom with you. In Craven’s original script, Freddy was a child molester and even if they officially dropped it from the backstory, it is still there in spirit. 

But Freddy would not work without the right man behind the makeup and Robert Englund earned his horror icon status with this character. The only horror movie monster to be played by the same actor throughout the original run of films, Englund created Freddy onscreen, adding playful little touches here and there. He has stated that the make up process for the burned face was so long and difficult it didn’t take him much to get to the place where he wanted to kill people. Whatever his motivation, the film would not work without Englund, plain and simple. 

But a movie monster does not work without good prey and Freddy has some good prey in this film. Craven pulls the Psycho twist of having us introduced to Tina and assume she is the lead character until she is killed off at the end of the first act. I know Heather Langenkamp has taken a lot of knocks for her acting but I think she works the material as well as anyone. Nancy is a survivor and the first horror heroine I had seen actively gear up for battle and take the fight to the bad guy. She probably will never win an Oscar, but I believe her character and feel bad for her that no one, not even her boyfriend (played by a young Johnny Depp in his first film role) or her parents believe her. 

Craven also uses the dream imagery to its fullest low-budget best. The line between dream and reality is never clear. There is no sudden change of scenery or weird transition sequences. The character is simply doing something as simple as sitting in class and then sees a body bag in the hallway. These seamless transitions make sense because, as we realize at the end of the film, everything that has happened has been part of one long nightmare. The film is not called Nightmare on Elm Street, it is A Nightmare on Elm Street. Craven never envisioned this as a series of films, it was always meant to be a one off. The only reason that there was an open ending was because the producer, Bob Shaye, insisted on it. He saw the potential for a franchise and, for better or worse, that is what we got. 

A Nightmare on Elm Street is a genre classic and one of the late Wes Craven’s best films. A must watch for any horror fan. 

More films from 1984 to check out: 

Johnny Dangerously – Underappreciated Michael Douglas parody of the gangster film, ably supported by Marilu Henner, Griffin Dunne, and Joe Piscopo. 

Starman – John Carpenter film about an alien who takes the form of a woman’s late husband after he crash lands on Earth. She joins him as he runs to meet a rescue ship. Surprisingly sweet and a little sad, Jeff Bridges was nominated for an Academy Award as Best Actor for this film.   

The Terminator – Arnold Schwazenegger became a star for his portrayal of lead role, a robot covered in human skin, sent to kill a woman named Sarah Connor. Linda Hamilton is the correct Sarah Connor, future mother of the leader of the human rebellion John Connor, and Michael Biehn is the man sent back in time to protect her. I consider this more science fiction action than horror based on the way James Cameron directs it.

Stars: Kimberly Beck, Corey Feldman, Peter Barton 

Director: Joseph Zito 

Jason comes back for one more adventure at Crystal Lake… 

Brief synopsis: 

We start the film with the aftermath of Friday the 13^th Part 3 being cleaned up by the police. Jason is placed in an ambulance and taken to the morgue as everyone thinks he is dead. They are wrong. Jason wakes up, kills the morgue attendant and a nurse, and then heads home. 

The next morning, we meet the Jarvis family consisting of mom Tracy, late teen daughter Trish, dog Gordon, and young horror buff and mask maker supreme Tommy (played by Feldman). Tracy is recently separated from her husband and a little concerned about the group of post-high school teenagers renting the cabin next door. This group of barely legal teens includes a pre-fame Crispin Glover (working on his George McFly role) as Jimmy. He is there with his friends Ted, long-time couple Paul and Sam, and new couple Sara and Doug. The group also meets a pair of twins, Tina and Terri, who are more than happy to skinny dip with people they have never met before. 

Trish and Tommy meet the final member of the cast, Rob, when he helps them fix their car and they bring the stranger carrying a knife and gun into their home minutes later without any worries. Man, the 80’s really were a different time… 

Spoilers below (you have been warned): 

The teens throw a party. All the boys except Doug flirt with the twins, pissing Paul’s girlfriend Sam off. She decides to go for a swim to cool off and gets killed by Jason. Paul finally realizes that he is being a jerk and goes off after his rightfully pissed off girlfriend only to find her dead in a raft and get killed immediately afterwards. Twin Tina decides if she can’t have Paul, she will settle for Jimmy and they go upstairs and have sex. Sara and Doug also head upstairs and Sara loses her virginity to Doug, a bad move in a Friday the 13^th film. They are dispatched in the shower, quickly followed by the remainder of their friends in the cabin. 

Meanwhile, it is revealed that Rob is there to hunt and kill Jason. After killing the power, the mom, and the dog at the Jarvis house, Jason then goes after Tommy and Trish. Rob gets there and is quickly dispatched by the killer. Tommy finds Rob’s scrapbook which includes a drawing of young Jason. Tommy then shaves his head and takes a machete to the madman’s head, finally killing him. Later at the hospital, the siblings embrace before Tommy looks into the camera was a crazed look in his eyes. 

My thoughts (with spoilers): 

Widely considered one of the better films in a so-so franchise, Friday the 13^th: The Final Chapter was supposed to be just that. Tom Savini came back to kill his creation and there were absolutely no plans to have another film in this series. But money usually changes people’s minds and this film was extremely successful, grossing $33.3 million on a $2.2 million budget. Even with marketing costs, that is still a huge net profit. To put it in modern figures, that would be the same as making almost $105 million against a $7 million budget. With that result, of course there were going to be more films. 

So why did The Final Chapter get a review from me and Friday the 13^th Part 3 did not? Quite frankly, I do not like Part 3. The final girl is annoying beyond belief and there is even an implication that Jason, with the mind of a child, might have been inappropriate with her. The bikers make no sense, the 3D is horrible with or without the blue and red glasses, and Shelly may be the worst character in a Friday the 13^th film and that is saying a lot. Other than the hockey mask, there is really no reason to watch it. 

Not that this one is a lot better but at least I am not rooting for the killer. I like the characters here, however thinly drawn they are. Sam is in a long term relationship with Paul and gets rightfully pissed off when he not only flirts with another girl but begins slow dancing with Tina right in front of her. To her credit, Sam does not start a fight but instead removes herself from the situation. Paul also makes a decision to stop himself from going any further with Tina, going after his girlfriend instead. In a better written film, they could actually be our final couple, overcoming obstacles to be stronger in the end. Alas, this is a Friday the 13^th film and they have already had sex so they die. 

All in all, the characters and actors are all good in their weakly written roles. Sara and Doug are sweet as a new couple, Jimmy is a little off and crazy but in a mostly good way, Rob is an idiot but well-meaning, and the Jarvis family actually seems like a family unit. We believe that Tommy and Trish are siblings and that Tracy is their mom. Justice for Tracy and Gordon, both of whom did nothing to get Jason’s ire up except be in the wrong place at the wrong time. The only character who truly annoys is Ted but he is supposed to be annoying. Lawrence Monoson (the title character in the criminally underrated The Last American Virgin) had a range that was not ever put to good use. He was wonderfully sweet and loving in American Virgin but here he is annoying and rude and he plays them both perfectly. He deserved a better career. 

The film moves at a good pace, has some good kills, and ends well. What else can I say, it is a Friday the 13^th film, you know what you’re getting. I recommend watching this one at least once. 

More films from 1984 to check out: 

Police Academy – Stupid fun with Steve Guttenberg and a young Kim Cattrall. How this became a long-running series is still a mystery to me. The Friday the 13^th of comedy films. 

Sixteen Candles – John Hughes classic about a woman who is so self-centered that she schedules her wedding for the same weekend as her sister’s 16^th birthday. Or a coming-of-age film about high school and teenage romance, you pick. 

The Karate Kid – Daniel LaRusso moves to California and immediately gets on the wrong side of the local karate gang. Luckily, mentor Mr. Miyagi helps teach the teenager karate and life lessons. Ralph Macchio and Elisabeth Shue are a cute couple and William Zabka plays a great villain but Pat Morita steals the show as the calm and wise sensei.

Stars: Dan Aykroyd, Bill Murray, Harold Ramis, and Sigourney Weaver 

Director: Ivan Reitman 

Who you gonna call? The movie that debuted the same day as Gremlins and narrowly beat it at the box office - Ghostbusters 

Brief synopsis: 

Peter Venkman (Murray), Ray Stanz (Aykroyd), and Egon Spengler (Ramis) are failed academics trying to prove supernatural phenomena. They have some luck in the New York City Library, getting ectoplasm and attempting to catch a ghost, but return to their offices at Columbia University to find they are being kicked out. Venkman, ever the con man, manages to convince Ray to take a 3^rd mortgage on his house to buy an abandoned fire house and set up their business – Ghostbusters. They even find enough money to hire a secretary, Janine (national treasure Annie Potts). 

At first, they receive only a few calls. First, a local hotel calls regarding a specter that has been there for years. The boys may destroy a ballroom and a laundry cart with their proton packs, but they do eventually manage to capture the green ghost, lovingly nicknamed Slimer. Egon also chooses this job to mention that the proton packs are basically unlicensed nuclear reactors and to never cross the streams of power coming from them. Then cellist Dana Barrett (Weaver) sees some weird things in her apartment, including eggs cooking by themselves on the counter and another dimension in her refrigerator. She goes to them for assistance and is instantly put off by the lecherous Venkman. The group promise to look into her problems and get back to her. 

But suddenly, it seems like New York City is overrun with ghosts and the ghostbusters find themselves overwhelmed with work. They soon hire another ghostbuster, Winston Zeddimore (the fabulous Ernie Hudson) and are embroiled in a fight with Walter Peck from the EPA… 

Spoilers below (you have been warned): 

It turns out that Dana’s apartment building is actually the epicenter of the crisis. The building was built by a Gozer-worshipping architect to attract and mask ghostly energy. Peter finally gets a date with Dana but she is possessed by the demon Zuul while her neighbor, Louis Tully (a hilarious Rick Moranis), is possessed by another entity, Vinz. They are eventually turned into demon dogs by the demon Gozer to be her pets. Meanwhile, Peck gets a court order to shut down the containment unit, resulting in all the ghosts who had been caught being released. The mayor sides with the ghostbusters and sets them free. 

They then make their way to Dana’s apartment, confronting Gozer. Gozer gives them the chance to choose the way they will die and Ray ends up accidentally thinking of the Stay Puft marshmallow man. The marshmallow man is brought to life, over 50 feet, and makes his way towards the group. Egon encourages them to cross the streams of their Proton Packs, eventually destroying Gozer and the marshmallow man. Dana and Louis return to their human forms and Dana kisses Peter. The Ghostbusters emerge from the building as the heroes of New York City. 

My thoughts (with spoilers): 

There are certain reviews that have been very easy for me to write. The Thing, which I actively watch multiple times a year, felt like it had been in my head the whole time and I just needed to get the words down on my computer. I had honestly thought that Ghostbusters would be the same way but I was wrong. This is a film that I have grown up with, that I have shared with my kids and grandkids, that has been background noise while I was writing, and that I have quoted in real life. No kidding, one day my supervisor called me to her desk by my name and I said, out loud, “There is no Cristina, only Zuul.” My supervisor didn’t seem to get it but her supervisor laughed out loud in her office and asked me if I just quoted Ghostbusters. Got to have some fun in those cubicles. 

So why has this been so hard? Because as I sat down to actively watch it for the first time in years, I found one element taking away from my enjoyment and, surprisingly, that was Bill Murray as Peter Venkman. While his delivery is impeccable and he plays the character perfectly, Venkman is a sleaze beyond measure and he kept giving me the ick. He also does not really have any kind of character arc. He doesn’t do anything to earn Dana’s trust or a date. I wanted her to keep turning him down but it seems like the only reason she says yes is so that we can have a climax to the film. Their so-called romance rings false and I really wanted her to stay as far away from him as possible. 

Other than that, this is a great film. The visual effects are amazing and Slimer is a fun little homage to the late John Belushi. The chemistry between the cast is incredible and I will always be a Janine/Egon stan. They should have been together in the second film and I truly believe that the only reason they weren’t was because they needed a storyline for Rick Moranis beyond being their lawyer. In addition, it would have solved many of the issues I have regarding the films that have come out recently in this franchise. There is no explanation for where Egon has been other than out in the middle of nowhere and having abandoned his daughter. Making Janine his wife and the mother of his daughter would have fixed not only the timeline but also allowed a story where Janine, aware of what her husband is doing and supporting him, raises their daughter away from the ghostbusting life to keep her protected. Boom – Egon isn’t a deadbeat dad, we have more of a connection to the first film, and Annie Potts gets the screentime she deserves. 

The script is tight and there is not a wasted moment. Comedy is interspersed to break up the tension and give the audience a release, as all good horror films should do. The dialogue is quick and snippy, like a 1930’s screwball comedy. The actors are all game and even the smallest part is perfectly cast. All of them came back together for the lesser sequel which, while still good, is just not up to par with the original. I would actually put the all-female Ghostbusters second in the series as it was funnier to me and honored the original without copying it. Sacrilege I know but this is my personal opinion and I stand by it. I am not a fan of the last two sequels at all, despite containing many of my favorite actors. 

Ghostbusters is a classic. It showed be seen at least once by everyone. It will be good for anyone over the age of 10 as it is not too scary. The ghosts are creepy without being gross-out and Slimer even became the lead of the later cartoon series. There is humor for both children and adults so no one feels left out. I know if you are reading this review, you have probably already seen this film at least once but a rewatch is always a good idea.

Other films from 1984 to check out: 

Footloose – Friday the 13^th victim Kevin Bacon finally gets the lead role he deserves in this classic dance film. A town has banned dancing and this upstart makes it his mission to bring dancing back. Great soundtrack (Heaven Helps the Man is underrated classic) and a fun time. Based on a real town that banned dancing. 

Splash – Ron Howard directs this story of a man, a young Tom Hanks, who falls in love with mermaid Daryl Hannah. A stellar supporting cast includes the late John Candy and Eugene Levy. Fun fact: the name Madison was supposed to be joke about commercialism. Instead, it started a trend and is now one of the most popular names for girls. 

V: The Final Battle – The better half of the miniseries duo, although I still watch both every few years, this allegory of World War II deals with alien invaders who look like humans but that is just cover for the monsters who lie beneath. The birth scene of a human/alien hybrid is unforgettable and a rare chance to see Robert Englund (aka Freddy Krueger) as a good guy.

Stars: Zach Galligan, Phoebe Cates 

Director: Joe Dante 

Oh 1984, the first year I can remember really going to the movies on a constant basis. Up until then, it had been an occasional thing but the summer of ’84 found me in the theater constantly with films I still watch and have shown to my kids and grandkids. Let’s start with a classic – Gremlins. 

Brief synopsis: 

Failed inventor Rand Peltzer is looking for the perfect gift for his son Billy in a Chinatown curio shop. He finds it with the cute little creature called a Mogwai. The old man who runs the shop refuses to sell it to Rand, telling him that with the Mogwai comes great responsibility. His grandson, well aware that the shop needs the money, sells it to Rand anyway. That is where the three rules are spelled out to Ram. Rule number 1 – don’t get him wet. Rule number 2 – never feed him after midnight. Rule number 3 – the most important rule of them all, keep him away from bright lights, especially sunlight because that will kill him. 

Meanwhile, his son Billy is living a depressing life in a depressing town. The local town mogul, Mrs. Deagle, delights in keeping everyone else in the town down, throwing out people who cannot pay their rent with a gleeful look in her eyes. She hates Billy and threatens his dog Barney after the pup accidentally breaks her snowman. He works as a teller at the bank, trying to save up money to go to art school while also supporting his parents and flirting with fellow teller Kate. His VW bug barely runs and his neighbor Mr. Futterman encourages him to buy American. A World War II vet, Futterman is convinced that the Germans put gremlins in their machinery. Futterman himself drives an American Harvester tractor everywhere. 

Rand proudly gives his son the pet who he has named Gizmo. Billy is given the three rules but, unfortunately, a clumsy Corey Feldman sets a night of terror into motion when he accidentally spills water on Gizmo… 

Spoilers below (you have been warned): 

It turns out that spilling water on the Mogwai causes them to multiply. Gizmo spits out five new Mogwai from his body and is not happy about it in the least. We soon discover that these new creatures are devious and mean, especially the leader with a little furry Mohawk, Stripe. Billy takes one of the creatures to his high school science teacher to get his opinion, even creating another creature as a demonstration of what happens when water touches them. That night, all the creatures except Gizmo beg to eat and Billy feeds them based on his clock saying it is before midnight. His science teacher leaves a sandwich by the new creature’s cage and the animal eats it. 

All of the creatures go into cocoons and soon emerge as green, slimy creatures, our gremlins. The one at the high school kills the teacher while the ones at home go after Billy’s mom. In an amazing scene, she goes to town on them, quickly dispatching several of them by using her blender, a knife, and a microwave. Billy comes in to find one of the gremlins attacking him mom and throws in to its death in a fire. He chases Stripe but is too late to stop the gremlin from jumping into a pool, multiplying like crazy and the new batch of creatures attacking the town. 

Mrs. Deagle is killed when they rewire her stair chair and send her hurtling out a second story window. They take Mr. Futterman’s tractor and ram it into his house. The havoc reaches a local bar where Kate works and she is forced to serve them as they all demonstrate different personalities. Billy eventually rescues Kate and they hide out at the bank where Kate reveals that she has a very good reason to hate Christmas. Her Dad was trying to impersonate Santa Claus and broke his neck going down the chimney. Young Kate saw her dead father being brought out of the chimney in the red suit and that was how she learned there was no Santa Claus. 

Eventually, our heroes find the gremlins in a movie theater watching Snow White and the Seven Dwarves. The couple and Gizmo blow up the theater killing all of the gremlins except Stripe, who snuck out to get more candy at the store across the street. The trio make it into the store and Kate works on turning on the lights, accidentally turning on a fountain in the garden department. Stripe attacks Billy but Gizmo rescues him by driving a Barbie car into a window shade and melting Stripe in the sunlight. The group goes home to recover but the old Chinese man shows up to reclaim his pet. He explains that Billy may someday be ready to care for Gizmo but he is not ready yet. Gizmo speaks for the first time, saying Bye Billy before they leave to go back home. 

My thoughts (with spoilers): 

One of my favorite films of all time, Gremlins is a classic. Gizmo is the cutest thing going and I will someday have him on my stuffed animal shelf next to Wicket the Ewok, Stitch, Eeyore, E.T., and Sharktopus. This film is a quirky mix of fun and scary, giving you enough horror to haunt your dreams. After this film and Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom, Stephen Speilberg convinced the MPAA to create the PG-13 rating as these films were too intense for PG but not scary enough for R. 

The rules, admittedly, are silly but you sometimes have to give a film a mulligan to enjoy it. I love the fact that the sequel, which there will be a review for later on this site, also discusses the various issues with the rules that were set out for our heroes. Chris Columbus wrote this film and if that name sounds familiar it would be because he is responsible for multiple generations of children’s film memories. In addition to Gremlins, he also wrote The Goonies before moving on to directing some small films like Home Alone, Mrs. Doubtfire, Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone, and Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets. The director, Joe Dante, also had a successful career including Piranha, The Howling, Innerspace, and The Burbs. 

The setup is simple but effective. We have a father who wants to get his son a special gift and, once he finds it, stops at nothing to get it. The problem is that he and Billy truly do not understand that sometimes the most dangerous things come in the most adorable packages. Through carelessness, they break the rules, not understanding the gift they had been given. As the original owner explains at the end of the film, “You do with mogwai what your society... has done with all of nature's gifts. You do not understand. You are not ready.” This statement is, sadly, still true today. Despite valid proof of the dangers of global warning, there are still many who refuse to listen and continue to destroy nature’s many gifts and future generations will pay the price for this willful ignorance much the same way as Kingston Falls is destroyed through Billy’s carelessness. When Gizmo is hit with water and multiplies, Rand’s first thought isn’t about the implications of this form of reproduction, it is how to monetize it. 

The actors are good but they are secondary to the gremlins and Gizmo. We instantly fall in love with the quirky little furball who bears who looks almost like a mix between Yoda and the Ewoks from the Star Wars franchise. He is sweet, small, and fluffy. The difference between him and his offspring is immediately obvious with Stripe trying to bite Billy’s friend Pete (Corey Feldman) right after he is born. Gizmo is pure and his copies are corrupt. The expressions on Gizmo are wonderful, especially during the only real scene of acting during the film, Kate’s monologue about why she hates Christmas. This is an especially dark story to put in a film and the cuts to Gizmo as he listens to her show true empathy and sadness. Let’s face it, if you are reading this site, you have seen Gremlins but there is always a reason to watch it again. 

Funny, scary, and with a distinctive soundtrack, this is a classic for a reason. Funnily enough, it was released on the same day as another classic film that just beat it out at the box office but we will get to that one next time… 

More films from 1984 to check out: 

Top Secret – Film debut for late Val Kilmer is hilarious in this slapstick parody film from the guys who gave us Airplane. This film opened on the same day as Gremlins and got lost in the glut of great films released that summer. Val Kilmer is a famous singer who gets drawn into a rebel alliance during World War II. Sight gags galore and a fun soundtrack with a highlight being “Skeet Surfing” which I will bet was the inspiration for Weird Al’s later song “Trigger Happy”. 

Romancing the Stone – First collaboration between Michael Douglas, Kathleen Turner, and Danny DeVito and it is great. A sheltered romance novelist goes to Columbia to save her sister’s life and meets renegade Michael Douglas. Great action set pieces, comedy, and romance in the perfect balance. 

This is Spinal Tap – The late Rob Reiner’s directing film debut about an aging rock band’s attempt to make a comeback. Michael McKean, Christophen Guest, and Harry Shearer are the band and Guest would take the mockumentary format and turn it into an art form in later years. This film goes to 11.

Stars: Emilio Estevez, Lance Henriksen 

Director: Joseph Sargent 

Some anthology films attempt to tie their segments together with a wraparound story while others are more of a short story collection with similar themes. The little-known Nightmares fits into the latter category. 

Brief synopsis: 

Four stories to give you nightmares… 

Spoilers below (you have been warned): 

Story 1 – Terror in Topanga 

Escaped mental patient and serial killer William Henry Glazier is on the attack in Topanga. A highway officer is his latest victim but nicotine addicted Lisa doesn’t care. She is out of cigarettes and, despite her husband Henry’s warnings, goes out into the night for another pack. She gets her cigarettes and then stops for gas. As the attendant gases up her vehicle, he seems to be very interested in what is going on in the car. Suddenly he breaks open the window of Lisa’s car with the gas nozzle, drags her out of the car, and shoots the escaped madman in the back of her car. Unknown to Lisa, Glazier had gotten into the car while she got her cigarettes. The police bring her home and she throws away her cigarettes. 

Story 2 – The Bishop of Battle 

J.J. Cooney (Estevez) is an expert at video games but has yet to master the Bishop of Battle, a shooter game. His friend Zock points out that there is supposedly a 13^th level to the game that no one has ever reached. The friend does not think the level exists but J.J. does and is determined to beat it. Becoming obsessed, he even breaks into the arcade at night to continue to try and beat the 12^th level. He finally succeeds and is shocked to find the game coming to life around him. He uses the gun from the game to shoot the objects flying at him and escapes the arcade. However, he drops the gun in the process and is soon confronted by The Bishop from the game. The next morning his friends come to the arcade only to see J.J. trapped in the game before finally turning into a character in the game. 

Story 3 – The Benediction 

Father Frank McLeod (Henriksen) has lost his faith. After witnessing the murder of a young boy and then officiating his funeral, Father McLeod confesses his loss of faith to his Bishop. He resigns from the church and leaves with only some holy water as a reminder of his days in the priesthood. As he drives down the road, a black truck suddenly attacks him. It is eventually revealed that this truck is Satan and he is trying to kill the priest. After some cat and mouse, Frank’s car is destroyed and he throws the holy water on the vehicle in a last attempt to stop it. The vehicle disappears and Frank, his faith restored, asked to be taken to his parish hospital. 

Story 4 - Night of the Rat

A family is terrorized by rats in their home. They manage to kill one but soon find that the remaining one is large and dangerous, destroying pipes and electrical outlets. An exterminator is brought in by the wife however her husband, convinced he knows better, fires the man. The exterminator was so disturbed by the damage he saw that he researched similar occurrences and discovers the existence of a “Devil Rat”. He phones the wife to warn her. The wife tries to warn her husband but he does not listen, destroying their home as he tries to kill the rat. Eventually the family is cornered in the master bedroom and the rat telekinetically begins to communicate with the daughter, explaining all they want is their child. The father retrieves the dead rat and gives it to the “Devil Rat” who then takes her child and leaves. 

My thoughts (with spoilers): 

I have told you before that I love anthology films and this one is a relic from my many nights roaming the video store. These stories are morality tales and there are lessons to be learned in them all. The first one deals with addiction and letting it control you to the point that you put your life in danger. Lisa knows that there is a killer on the loose and chooses her addiction over safety. Her need for nicotine almost gets her killed and this brush with death gets her to quit. I used Chantix but whatever works for you… 

In the second story, J.J.’s obsession with the video game leads him to break into the arcade at night. He commits a crime just to beat the game and prove he is the best. The pride and obsessive behavior leads to his downfall as he is sucked into the video game to live the rest of his life. He may have beat the game but it cost him his life. Estevez is just starting out his career in this film and his talent is evident. It is a shame that he really doesn’t act anymore. 

The third story is about the loss of faith and rediscovering it. Lance Henriksen is wonderful as a priest who sees senseless loss and can no longer believe in a God who would let that happen. This is relatable to me as a former Catholic who wonders every day why there is so much suffering in the world and why God allows it. In real life, there are no easy answers but this one ends a little too easily with the truck literally being Satan and using holy water to vanquish it. Yes, faith is restored but as far as miracles go, this is a weak one at best. 

The rat story is actually got two tellings in 1983 – this short story and a full-length film called Of Unknown Origin. Honestly, the short story route is probably the best way to go. This story has little meat on the bones and at least this telling adds in a little fun with the telekinesis arc and some pathos with the rat just wanting her dead child back. The acting is fine but this is the weakest story of the bunch. It is the father’s obsession with killing the rat himself that leads to the destruction of his home and it is only when he cedes to the rat that he gets some semblance of peace back. His pride is his downfall. 

All in all, this is one of the better horror anthologies to come from the 1980’s and worth tracking down for a watch. 

More films from 1983 to check out: 

Jaws 3 – Sue me – I enjoy this one and came very close to doing a review on it. Is it a good movie, no, but it is fun in its own way and gives us some decent character work between the Brody brothers and the women in their lives. Dennis Quaid swears he was on cocaine for the whole filming and cannot remember any of it but it doesn’t show. Bess Armstrong deserved a better career than the one she got but at least she got to interact with the sea animals. 

Something Wicked This Way Comes – Disney adaptation of a Ray Bradbury story about a mysterious carnival that gives people what they want at a price. First time I saw Jonathan Pryce in a film and he wowed me with his portrayal of Mr. Dark. 

Valley Girl – Classic comedy starring Nicolas Cage and Deborah Foreman as star-crossed lovers in Los Angeles. She is a rich girl from the Valley and he is a punk from Hollywood who fall in love against their friends wishes. Sweet with an amazing soundtrack.